Andrea (perfectpinkjoe) wrote in innerbeautyx,
Andrea
perfectpinkjoe
innerbeautyx

stamped/theme

Since this is Memorial Day weekend, I thought it would be proper for each of us to write a small memorial for someone we've loved and lost. How you interpret this is up to you. My original intention is for it to be for someone who's actually passed on, but I realize that there may be a few of you who've never had a loved one pass away. So, however you would like to interpret "lost" is fine.

I have no idea where to start. But here goes.

I'll start with my Great Nana. She died when I was around three or four. I remember going to visit her a few days before she died in the hospital. I remember visiting her at my Nana's house. She died the day she was supposed to go home from the hospital. After she died, I always called the brightest star in the sky "Great Nana star."

My Great Uncle Jack died when I was a little older. We'd go over to his house, and he'd tell jokes and we'd all laugh together. they had a dog and we'd send him out of the room and hide a cookie and then have him go looking for it. He smoked and drank, and he died of emphasema. He had lung cancer too, I think. His funeral was the first I ever went to, and it was the first time I really dealt with death, because I didn't really understand death when my Great Nana died. I cried at his funeral, and I remember not really feeling anything else.

The next person I loved who died was Erin. This is the hardest for me to talk about. She died on November 24, 2003. She was my babysitter when I was little, and my friend when I didn't need a babysitter anymore. She was always there for me, and she was like the older sister I never had. She was a truly good person, one of the very few I've ever known. She died of a pulmonary embolism on her way to school. She was a senior, and it hurts so much to think of all the things she won't get to do. I miss her more than I ever thought I could miss anyone. I'll stop there, because I could go on forever about her.

My grandfather died on my birthday this year. I only saw him once, when I was four, and I have that one memory of him still. We were planning on visiting him this summer in Peru. I only wish I had been able to know him before he died. My mom feels the same way. He had stomach cancer, and by the time it was discovered, there wasn't anything they could do.

Dana died last week. He was my Dad's cousin, and it was really hard. He's in all the memories I have at family gatherings. I didn't really know him that well, but it's so hard knowing I'll never see him again. He was only fifty one, and he died of cancer. I miss him, and it's hard seeing the rest of the family deal with it.

That wasn't very personal, but it's the best I can do for now. My heart's hurting for Dana and for Erin, and it's hard for me to talk about them. I didn't want to cry today, so I didn't put much feeling into this. I made a post in my livejournal about them recently, and that was kind of letting go for me.
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